Imagine this: You’re facing a tough situation at work. You’ve been preparing for weeks to lead a critical meeting, only for a colleague to step in at the last minute and overshadow your presentation. As you sit there stewing, a story starts to form in your mind: “They don’t think I’m capable. I’m not leadership material.”

This narrative begins to dictate your emotions and actions. You withdraw, avoid opportunities to speak up, and convince yourself it’s safer to stay in the background. Over time, this story becomes your reality—not because it’s true, but because you allowed it to take root.

Insights: The Power of Your Narrative

The stories we tell ourselves have extraordinary power over our lives. They shape our confidence, our relationships, and even how others perceive us. But here’s the catch: not all of these stories are accurate or helpful.

Brené Brown’s phrase, “Here’s the story I’m telling myself…” encourages us to recognize the stories for what they are—interpretations, not facts.

Similarly, Eleanor Roosevelt reminds us: “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” The narrative you accept determines how you interpret external events and influences your behavior.

Take Control: How to Rewrite Your Narrative

If the stories you’re telling yourself aren’t serving you, it’s time to rewrite them. Here’s a practical approach:

1. Catalog Your Thoughts
   Start with awareness. Journaling can help you identify recurring negative thoughts or patterns in your internal dialogue.

2. Challenge Their Origins
   Ask: Why do I believe this? Is it based on evidence? or is it rooted in past fears, assumptions, or insecurities?

3. Evaluate Usefulness
   Determine if these narratives are helping you achieve your goals—or if they’re holding you back. If they aren’t helpful, it’s time to reframe them.

4. Reframe with Empathy
   Imagine your best friend was in your shoes. What advice or encouragement would you offer them? Use that same kindness and wisdom to reframe your self-talk.

5. Practice Positive Reframing
   When resistance arises (e.g., “But this feels fake”), remind yourself that negativity often feels more “real” because fear and doubt are louder emotions. Choose to challenge those feelings with intentional, positive alternatives.

The Impact of a New Narrative

When you consciously rewrite your internal story, you’re choosing to lead your life with intention and resilience. By replacing self-doubt with empowering beliefs, you give yourself permission to grow, take risks, and connect authentically.

So, what’s one story you’ve been telling yourself that no longer serves you? Write it down. Then, rewrite it into something constructive and empowering.

Your narrative is in your hands. Start crafting the story you deserve today.