How Jimmy Stopped Being a Victim
This story is inspired by real events.
When Jimmy started at his new company, he had trouble setting up the mailing label printer. The IT guy said he left Jimmy with everything he needed to make it work. But despite Jimmy's best efforts, it still didn't. Lucky for Jimmy, the department across the hall was willing to help. It shipped his packages for him while he tried to fix the issue.
The problem was, Jimmy never quite got the system up and running. He knew the longer it stayed unfixed, the more incompetent he would look. He already had a workaround in place. He figured the less he said about it, the better. No one would have to know the system wasn't working as intended. After all, people were still getting their packages, right?
Until, of course, the number of packages sent on Jimmy's behalf became too many. This situation got the attention of Travis, the other department's supervisor. Travis was wondering why there was a significant uptick in shipping expenses for his department. When he did, he discovered Jimmy's piggybacking. Travis hid his frustration from Jimmy. But he still informed Stan, Jimmy's boss, about Jimmy's lack of effort.
To no one's surprise, Stan gave Jimmy an earful. A former Vietnam vet, Stan had no place for unmet expectations. Finding out people were covering up problems only escalated his short temper.
Jimmy first responded by explaining everything unfair about the situation, like the neglect from IT. That didn't reduce Stan's ire. When that failed, Jimmy made the case that he still found a way to mail packages despite the dysfunction.
Jimmy kept trying to deflect responsibility. While thinking of what to say next, he said something which surprised himself:
"I should've done more to see this through."
Stan was still mad at Jimmy. But Stan calmed down because Jimmy stopped acting helpless. They began talking about what next steps Jimmy needed to take. Then Stan set a deadline for Jimmy to have everything done. Stan also gave a blunt warning about what would happen if Jimmy didn't follow through. He's still a gruff former Vietnam veteran, after all.
Let's take a closer look at the situation. What were the specific steps Jimmy took to stop being a victim, even if it took some prodding?
He changed his goal from avoiding blame to completing the task. Jimmy realized Stan wouldn't back off if he continued to insist on his innocence. Once Jimmy saw the situation from Stan's point of view, he understood why Stan was mad. The company wasn't paying him to tell compelling stories of failure. The company was paying him to get things done, no matter the circumstances. The best way to make Stan happy was to fix the problem.
He shifted the locus of control. On some level, Jimmy already knew he wasn't helpless about the situation. But feeling blameless felt good. Having changed his goal, Jimmy acknowledged he could contact IT for help. Had he asked IT sooner, he could've avoided his current situation.
He discussed next steps he needed to take. Jimmy's taking ownership of the situation was a great first step. And, it's only a prerequisite for what has to happen after that. Jimmy shouldn't take responsibility only to buy time for himself or placate his boss. If he did, Stan would get twice as mad once he figures out Jimmy stalled. So Jimmy needed to line up the exact tasks he will do to fix the mailing system.
He became accountable for the actions he agreed to do. While this wasn't Jimmy's doing, it still is a key step in the process. The best way to make sure people meet expectations is to inspect their work. Plus, Stan made consequences clear if Jimmy didn't follow through. A lot of people settle for temporary damage control. They don't realize the best apology is fixing the problem.
If you know someone like Jimmy, find encouragement in the possibility of change. But also think about how you want to handle people who refuse to. If you want to brainstorm, I’m always available to help.
